“Tell me honestly,” she said, looking into his grey eyes. Some people might think that a dull color, but he brought them to life when he looked at her. He was so full of passion. Of life. “Do you only care about me because I’m useful to you, or do you care about me?”Her heart almost stopped as he took a moment to think through his answer. She had to know. Death held no fear for her at the moment, but that didn’t mean she wanted to reunite with her family just yet. Before she took this step with Eldon, she wanted to know how he really felt about her. Was she wasting her time on a man whose heart was already taxed too far, or was there room in there for her? Megan couldn’t be sure, but she believed that Mandy’s presence, in reality, would ensure his honesty.“Yes,” he finally said after a few heart-sickening moments. Megan stared at him, trying to decipher his answer. He stepped forward and grasped her hands, pulling them to his chest. “You’re one helluva woman, Megan. Strong, smart,. That was the first time, but that night, after two strong rum and cokes it just felt like the right thing to do when one of them bought me another drink at the bar. I don't know if it was because I had always heard that blacks were bigger or the thrill of doing something that most people thought was very wrong, but I always found myself looking at the black men in any group of men and wondering what it would be like to sleep with one. That night I found out and it changed my life. I know that it's not true that all black men are hung like a horse but the three I had been with were all on the large but not huge side and I really liked the full feeling they gave me. I found myself often looking at men's bulges, especially black men, and guessing how big they were hung. On an average the blacks had bigger bulges. I had enough money to be able to get a sitter a couple times a week so I could go out, and after about two months from when Ted moved out I found myself going out a couple.
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